I saw to the edge of all there is

I saw to the edge of all there is: a big hole. What is in this big hole is unknown, but what I see is how my emotions can fill it. 

Am I going to drown in this hole? My tears have filled it up to the top. With every drop of my tears, I can see different colours being reflected by the light of the night. 

Do these stars reflect the layers of my life? As I fill the hole, I struggle to separate the stars from my life.

Am I an ordinary star? A star which contains matter very like that contained in the sun. I am an ordinary person living amongst people and just wanting to fit in.

Am I a white dwarf? Their sources of energy have exhausted. Am I like those white dwarf stars, having exhausted all the energy I have to live?

Am I like the pulsars, flashing, or is it that I am trying to come out of my shell and you can glimpse me coming out slowly?

Do I see myself as a collapsar - that no material or light can escape and there is no hope as I have kept my feelings buried. Is it now too late to come out of this hole?